When I was 21, I came within five seconds of drowning in the Atlantic ocean. As I was going down for the third time, I looked to the shore and realized that this – my last moment – was the most lucid moment of my life. Everything else was a cartoon. Unreal. Fake. In the state I was in, only one thing was certain. I wanted to live. And in that moment, which felt like my last, something extraordinary took over – way beyond my exhaustion– and got me to the shore. It moved me… it swam me… until I – completely out of breath – could finally stand. And when I did, all I could do was fall to my knees and kiss the ground. And then I cried, singing whatever children’s songs I could think of. In that moment of pure exaltation, I was totally empty and full at the very same time. Saturated with grace. Complete. Needing nothing. No philosophy, no religion, no path, no politics, no future, no past. Only the simple joy of being alive.
When I think about Maharaji and what he has shown me it feels very much the same. In such a simple and loving way, he has connected me not only to the will to live, but to the primal force that moves me – the thing that swam me many years ago when I had nothing left to give. As my teacher, he has taught me many things – and all without a book. How to be who I am. The preciousness of human life. How to be in the moment. What it means to really appreciate. And how to be a student. As his student, I have learned that it doesn’t matter what I know, but who I am. Or more correctly, what I am. It’s what the poets pray to feel, so finally they’d have something worth writing about. When I feel it – and I do a lot – I am happy for absolutely no reason at all. Happy like someone on permanent vacation. Completely alive. Free. Content in a way that requires no action to prove itself whole. I’m talking unconditional love, folks. The big U.C. No strings attached. Free Parking in Monopoly. Unexpected snow day for the child within you. First kiss. Second chance. Arriving by already being there. More fun than you’ve ever had and there’s nothing’s going on. Voila! The peace that passes all understanding – even when your hard disk crashes.
Who is Maharaji? That’s for you to figure out. All I know is this: When I’m with him, I never want to leave. And when I do, my life begins all over again – whatever I was, before that moment, being left behind like some kind of second skin. Refreshed, renewed, re-awakened once again, I return to what I’ve come to call “my life” and stand amazed.
With great respect for your personal path and all the effort you are making to be free,
