Hi Lexy,

I want to make sure that you and anyone who reads this forum knows that anything I post on this forum is from a lay-person and are only suggestions.  I'm not a professional psychotherapist and I don't have any documented credentials to place before anyone when I make suggestions about what people ought to do when leaving Maharaji behind.

My only credentials are from the School of Life.  I think that counts a lot, but it doesn't get me any more money in my work!  LOL!

Everybody is so different:   Each individual's level of dedication/devotion is/has been unique concerning the process of leaving the practice of knowledge and following Maharaji.  Each person's approach has to be based upon what every individual assesses what is best for themself.  That's important to note, I think.

I am the last person who would ever place the word "should" before anyone when it comes to making individual choices about meditation or other decisions people make to help them get over all of this -- or anything for that matter! 

Having said that, my greatest concern is that each and every premie who decides to leave the cult has the widest range of options to choose from in their process of leaving, which I view as a process of a deeply emotional and psychological recovery, and most importantly -- a rediscovery of oneself.  Yet everyone has to make that assessment for themselves.  There is never a one size-fits-all in any process of recovery from any abusive situation.  On that subject, I can claim to be an expert!

Having said that, I am one person who posts regularly on this forum who believes that it is only common sense to not keep testing the poison (meditation) that has been the very trap that  placed one in the cult to begin with -- it was both the bait, the switch, and the catch. But others have a different opinon about this that I also respect.  That's kind of why I'm making this post. 

Yet, there is nothing wrong with taking deep breaths to ease tension, either, so long as those breaths are not attributed to another human being, namely:  Prem Rawat.

All that said, once again, it's my hope that everyone who reads what I post knows that I wish the best for each and every person who reads here.  Leaving this cult is not easy, particularly because of the deeply engrained  programming that included indoctrination about not using one's mind and surrendering one's personality, soul, and well-being to Maharaji, which meant putting his needs before ours all the time.  There are so many possible senarios based upon every person's level of commitment.  

Anyway, I really don't want anyone to think I have any pat answers to how to recover from having been involved in this cult.  I only wish the very best for everyone, with love and concern, compassion and empathy.

Truth be told, I have been the recipient of more real love and concern since I've been posting on this forum than all of the time I ever devoted to Maharaji.  These ex-premies have provided me with so much love, care, tolerance, support, and above, all I've never felt any hate. I feel fortunate.

The people who post here are people who can empathize like no others can.  Isn't that wonderful?  I think so!

I do a lot of research on the subject of cults because it's become an interest of mine aside from the "cult I was in."   Recently, I came upon an online discussion group where there was a person who was trying to leave the Hari Krishna cult and he lives in Italy.  He was absolutely desparate for some contact with former ex-followers of his cult.  I serached the world wide web for him and there was not ONE discussion group specifically for ISKCON former members.  I found that to be incredulous.  But, that's how it is. 

I've had an extradornairly tough and painful life -- beyond what most people could ever possibly imagine. I'm not unique, but unique enough.  My life has been so difficult and it still is difficult, and it started from the day I was born. But, from that I look for strength.  And from that strength I look for wisdom.  I owe so much to many here who have helped me.  That's why I want to pass it on.

Simply put, I don't always know what's right for everyone.  I'm just a simple human woman who's about to turn 51 (ouch!). 

That why I think that above everything, empathy is one of the best of all human qualities that I or anyone else can strive to have.  Here, or anywhere else.

Much love,

Cynthia