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Maybe a premie did that to prevent people watching it unless they go to the trouble of registering first. Well I get enough spam so I won't bother registering unless you tell me it's worse than the ones at the bottom of this page:
http://www.ex-premie.org/video/urmysaviour.html
Hey Joe I've heard on the grapevine that Kim O'Leary is replacing Natalie Maines as lead singer in the Dixie Chicks and they're going to call themselves the Gopi Chicks and go out on the road promoting George W. Bush and the war on terror and Prem Rawat the famous philanthropist and internationally renowned teacher of inner peace. He used to speak 48 languages which is why he still can't get the hang of English.
Modified by ocker at Fri, Jul 21, 2006, 02:46:37
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The scary bit was looking at that sweep of the crowd (who I might have been among- yikes!) That's Rich Neale singing the horrible 'Dance, dance, dance' which I'm pretty sure was introduced at festivals in '79. 'Now that we know your precious form,
There's one miracle we'd like you to perform...' (Roll over Burt Bacharach.) I think M first 'danced' in the west at Orlando, late 1978, when by doing so he accidentally put the nuclear computers on red alert (apparently). By Rome, 1980, he had restyled from the red-and-gold look to blue and white whilst on stage, waving a full-sized orchestral flute which took looking stupid to a whole new level of performance art. Holi / Guru Puja / Hans Jayanti, 1979, is my guess, from the context and styling. Does anyone recognise the stage architecture?
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Yeah, the first dancing was HJ 1978. The first appearance of the "half-naked-mala" was a program in Philadelphia in August, 1978, just a few months before that, but no dancing then, as I recall. This one doesn't look like the stage at Hans Jayanti, so it's probably either Holi, or Guru Puja, 1979. He was still waddling around on stage at Holi in 1980, and, I think, at a program in Kansas City in November, 1980. 1981 is kind of a blur, but the last cult festival I attended was July, 1982 in Miami Beach, and he was STILL dancing half naked then, although I recall standing in the very back row of the program wondering either, how the fuck I ever got involved in anything so stupid, OR, what the fuck was wrong with me that I could no longer relate. In any event, it was clearly over at that point. Isn't it funny how the mahatmas made him do all this against his will, and he was forced to set aside his valiant attempts to get rid of "Indian trappings." What a fucking liar Rawat is.
Modified by Joe at Fri, Jul 21, 2006, 17:02:21
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That's always one of the things that gets me when Rawat, or premies, say this stuff implying he was somehow a hapless victim of misunderstandings and Indian concepts. How stupid would a person have to be to get up there and dance and jiggled while people fainted like flies in ecstacy? ( Amazing we weren't stuffing dollar bills in the Mala.........) But really, I mean, is the guy so weak willed and ignorant he can be misled SO MANY times over the years? Rawat really likes to play the victim. Like oh poor me, they put the sign God flashing behind my head, oh poor me, they made me the dancing fool and I had to sit there with a crown where some of the jewels were not even REAL? Oh poor me I didn't know they were all giving me all their money, not going to college, oh poor me....I didn't know they would take the words of Arti seriously.... And then the premie revisionists, having made him into the biggest buffoon in the world because he was the victim of all the people around him... Then they talk about how wise, how smart, how loving, how strong, how insightful...etc.... The two things are totally at odds with eachother. Yes, Rajeswar and Charnanand are beside the stage with guns aimed at him saying "dance dance dance" Isn't it funny how the mahatmas made him do all this against his will, and he was forced to set aside his valiant attempts to get rid of "Indian trappings." What a fucking liar Rawat is. Joe one of the best points you have ever made. And there have been many.
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Another fall back for M . Male dancer @ bachlorette parties . good one Susan
Modified by geo at Mon, Jul 24, 2006, 09:40:43
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we could add to other people's posts. Sort of read this one if you are in a mood for a laugh. Umm or stay away if you are feel comtemplative and serious.....
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I think Rawat, the ultimate narcissist, at those "dancing" moments, really did believe he was the reincarnation of Krishna, come back in bodily form to play with his devotees. I just get the feeling his deluded, twisted, mind, at least at that point, really believed it, and he was just so blissfully, conceitedly happy, that he was the one, true, living Master. I mean, if he wasn't, why would 10,000 people in one place think so?
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He used to do a quick little trot (it can hardly be called a dance) with the arms in the air, do that pretentious blessings maneuver and then head off stage pronto (no doubt for a cognac and a smoke). It was like he couldn't get out of there fast enough. If he was really believing he was Krishna come back to dance with the gopis, he might have put a little more passion into it.The way he split so quickly each time it was like he was embarassed to be up there in that spot, having to perform like that. Never once did he seem truly into it or having fun, at least the dancing part. Though he used to seem to really get off on just sitting there in the mala grinning while they sang those ridiculous songs (not to mention Arti). Lapping up the worship. God only knows what went through his mind as he prepared himself in the getup, special flute in hand, mala draped over his head, crown placed on. I mean, what WOULD he be thinking at that point? Or would he be smoking and taking a drink until the last moment? I can imagine that situation would certainly call for a drink to rev up the old courage to trot out half naked in front of thousands of people and make such a spectacle of yourself. But the dancing part always seemed self-conscious and awkward to me, like he couldn't wait to get it over with. And the blessings thing I always felt he'd inherited from his father and felt awkward doing also, it never felt natural or like there was any actual blessings happening. You are so right, Joe, what kind of stupid idiots were we to fall for such nonsense?
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Jwa: Is that you? How are you? Nice crititque.
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Hi Joy, So, are you saying he saw it more as some kind of duty, something that just went along with the Perfect Master trip? But then the question is, was the trip just a family business with certain obligations and many, many perks, or was it that he really believed he was the current Krishna but wasn't always comfortable with what Krishna had to do? Do you see the difference that I'm talking about? I think that Rawat is extremely insecure, coming from a back-stabbing family, with lots of attention from sychophant devotees but probably not too much love or attention from either parent. I mean, when push came to shove the mother/son relationship was trashed for the purpose of cult power. So, the attention came from what people thought he was, not from himself as a person. So, he needs CONSTANT reassurance that he is God and can accept no disagreement on that point. But reality always is reminding him of his imperfection and his failure in his "Mission" to bring peace to the world. Hence, the fat naked dancing moments were reassurance, 10,000 people reaffirming his vulnerable belief about who he was. And, despite how it affects him negatively with respect to new people, he STILL can't give it up, so there is still darshan and worship festivals in Amaroo, probably more for the sick psychological needs of an aging avatar than anything else. What do you think? Joe
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I think in at least one of those Mala dances he appears to be enjoying to adulation too...I think the darshan video shows that for him those lines were a chore to be endured. I learned Spot On from the brits here...nice expression...stealing it.
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...another "posh" and slightly dated Brit expression.
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Hi Joe.I think on some level he MUST know he's not the Lord, but yet is so locked into the whole scene both emotionally and financially that he just carries on to avoid the cognitive dissonance, and hence the heavy drinking to drown it all out. Your comments re the constant assurance needed to keep the whole scheme propped up seem pretty right on, as to why he did/does it. The constant worship would serve to drown out the doubts in his own mind -- it seems strange to use that term in relation to him, who was supposed to have transcended mind, as we were indoctrinated all those years. (But since he is human, not Lord, that's what has to be used.) But of course nobody will ever know for sure what he thinks or feels, he probably doesn't even know himself. I'd be curious as to how his kids cope with it, and what they must think, and how they justify it to their friends. No doubt the friends don't know about the Krishna love-fests and dancing with crown, but the kids surely must. Do they ever stop to question, in the time-honored fashion of teenagers everywhere? Though I guess they're well beyond teenagers at this point. Or does the material payoff silence them all, M included? Money is a pretty big deal in Malibu, it would take real courage to chuck it all away as an act of rebellion. But can they all be that dishonest with themselves? Surely you would think at least one of the four kids would rebel in some way and want to denounce it all and seriously question what their dad gets up to and how his income is produced. Maybe they do, and it's just all hushed up from the top.
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I too find it interesting and thought provoking. I actually was way more suprised that Wadi and Daya were helping Dad in the family business than that Amar and Hansi seemed to have no profile at all. I can only guess that they have, as teens and adults, had to deal with people knowing Dad's a cult leader. However, they live and extremely wealthy existance and I would guess their peers are other wealthy Malibu young people. Look at my space Malibu. There is a Hans there. He sure looks like he could be our Hansi. There WAS an Amar but the last discussion of MySpace his profile is no longer public. Birthdays fit too. I didn't see Wadi...I heard a rumor though she may be married and a mom. There was a Daya put she is a premie kid not Daya Rawat. I'd love to know what they really think too. But even if they really don't like what Dad does, well, he is their Dad, and if he loves anyone in the world, genuinely, my first guess it would be those kids. And Marolyn too, I still think she tried hard to be a good mom and was a good mom in many ways. I bet they love her very very much. For all I know they are all totally into the family business. But my guess, like yours, is there is a lot of ambivalence, embarrassment, and denial. I have sometimes wondered if Rawat's recent desperate grasps at legitimacy have been because he knows his kids find him embarrassing.
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I was told quite recently from a reliable premie source that the daughters get upset with the criticism of their father. I suppose to them he is an adored father, and very successful motivational speaker and purveyor of world love and peace.
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I suppose to them he is an adored father, and very successful motivational speaker and purveyor of world love and peace. Not to mention, the divine money tree.
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Quite true Jim. The cars etc they have received from their Dad was all ultimately paid for by premies. His girls are probably very nice people and have no choice BUT believe that somehow the premies got enough out of it all to make it a fair exchange.
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Anth knew them most as real "kids" and I think he genuinely loved them for the little people they were. Anth and I have talked a bit about them and I feel he really has a soft spot in his heart for them to this day. Really who can blame him? I know just being far away from them I loved them...They were just so darn cute. I still think kids with those half indian have caucasian features are generally some of the most beautiful kids there are. I have a few freinds kids that look like the Rawat kids...I mean...they are just GORGEOUS. Mom is Swedish and Dad is Puerto Rican. They have three sons each one knock your socks of gorgeous. Especially when they were toddler....they had mom's swedish blond hair and the olive skin and the deep brown eyes. Another family I worked with had blonde mom and Indian dad and those babies were just like the Rawat kids. I mean, you can't help adoring something that looks like that any more than you can help loving a kitten or a puppy. We are hard wired to love cute things. Keeps us from eating our young. But I too, wish I could get some real update on how they turned out. My guess is with all the high level defectors we have seen here is that they must feel some sense of love and protection for the kids, just not their Dad. I for one can't get mad at Wadi or Daya for feeling upset by all the criticism of Dad on the web. I truly think he adores them. Do you watch the Sopranos? Its like Meadow. Tony only wants the best for her. But the girl who isn't his daughter is a stripper in his club getting beat up as Ralphies Goomar. She has her moments of questioning her Dad. But ultimately, with all the love she has recieved in her life from him she defends him to all outsiders....even if in her heart she knows what he is. I don't know much about Hansi and Amar. Rumour was that Hansi thinks its a cult. But hard to know....never had that confirmed to my satisfaction. 
 Can anyone confirm if this is or is not Hansi? He has a myspace Hans from Malibu. Nice looking boy whoever he is.
 
and that, it one gorgeous Newborn Premlata. 
God they were adorable.
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I can't / don't want to always write things I know on this open forum. I knew Anth and Dot way back and they kindly invited me to theirs since I ex-ed. Anth. is a natural stand up comic and used to give hilarious ( and probably sacreligious) satsang at community programmes in those days ( when he was teaching M's kids). I haven't seen any of those TV shows although they are available over here. France is no paradise and they have their own particular problems regarding child sex scandals which often seem to involve rural or small town communities and incest !
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Susan, we love the Sopranos all the way. That and Deadwood which, if you haven't seen, is a must. Lucky, lucky you that you can rent the first two seasons and take them with you to that boring island you're going to. You'll see. You'll be looking for an internet cafe just to read about it. It's, as you'll see, "f**kin' amazing" BTW, so is this Italian film we're in the middle of right now called "The Best of Youth" It's a full six and a half hours long and every single scene is just right. If you can ever find it anywhere, take my word for it. It's right up my alley. But as for the Sopranos analogy. It breaks down at a certain point as, one, the girls apparently work for the cult. That's a lot different than meeting for dinner and avoiding shop talk. Also, imagine a whole lot of websites that told the truth about Tony. Wouldn't Meadow have the guts to read and talk about them? It'd be difficult but, hey, that's her lot in life. It's not as if anyone's putting a full "Hamlet" on them or anything. All they have to do is renounce their father the cult leader and find another source of money.
Modified by Jim at Sun, Jul 23, 2006, 16:18:13
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Why watch DVDs of crime and sleaze in a Pacific Island when you could be wandering through Cook Island Pine forests? But whatever you do, don't miss out on drinking lots of wonderful coconut juice from young green coconuts and the tender grated flesh of young coconuts with any tropical fruit they may have growing there.
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Why watch DVDs of crime and sleaze in a Pacific Island when you could be wandering through Cook Island Pine forests? Because you can? Have you seen the series? How about Deadwood? Do they have it there? You'd love it, Ocker, probably because every second word is "fuck" and, unlike all the bullshit Hollywood westerns we're so used to, these guys were actually wearing authentic sarongs half the time. No, seriously, I'm in love with the series. Can't wait for tonight's episode.
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I have the soundtrack CD, is that enough? I watched 10 minutes of it once but I don't like realistic nastiness and sleaze only formulaic crime. I will defend to your death your right to watch anything you want as long as I don't have to.
I don't think Deadwood has made it to our fair shores unless they renamed it. There is a show with a name like it, I think it's called Deadwood Housewives.
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I hear its great. And as you know I love Sopranos and everyone who loves Big Love and Sopranos loved Deadwood. I think its the cowboys...cowboys bore me. But I am going to try it anyway. But Big Love...I didn't like the first episode but by the time they did the last one ...well....I TIVOd them both but watched Big Love finale first. As for the Wadi/Daya and Meadow analogy. Meadow isn't that old yet and even though Wadi is thirty she isn't hopeless. Meadow may well end up in family business despite her education. We know Tony doesn't want that but ( thats difference there...at least Tony knows he wants an honest life for his kids) things keep happening that make me think Meadow and AJ are doomed anyway. Well, AJ especially....but Meadow too. And don't you think Carmella's character has moved from being conflicted and ashamed of how Tony acquired their wealth to embracing it? Meadow could go bad....Wadi and Daya could secretly read this or talk about it .....but I just don't see with the conflict those kids are in ( and its not ALL the money ) that they are going to come out fighting here. I can't really see any reason they wouldn't love their Dad. At least from anything I have ever heard. They have their own real experience of this man loving and cherishing them and their mom too.....I can't see the fact that he ripped of, cheated and lied to thousands of people...which is to them sort of theoretical compared to their own lives....winning. Bonds of loyalty between parents and kids are a big thing. Even bigger than not living in Malibu palace. This is pure speculation.
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Trust me, Susan, the cowboy motif is no barrier. Last night, once again, great! I can't imagine how intense it would be sitting down and seeing it altogether though. I'm sure you've heard how the script's a combination of the most profane and most florid, almost Shakespearean stuff ever. You can miss a lot if you're not careful. You'll see. We started watching Big Love but Laur wasn't into it because the premise seemed so absurd. I think we saw two episodes, the first and maybe the fourth. I would like to see more, though. Chloe Sevigny, Harry Dean Stanton, Bill Paxton ... how could I not? I'll just have to watch it with one of my other wives, I guess. Susan, give me a break! There's no way in a million years Meadow would ever do anymore than take money from Tony. That ain't happening. AJ? Isn't he turning into a decent human being finally? You're right about Marolyn, I mean Carmella, though. Embracing it indeed! As for the girls, I'm sure they've dummied down on all the important points that it will be ever convenient to keep their float in Rawat's love parade.
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Tell Laurie that even with my connections to cults and Mormonism I didn't like the first episode at all. I felt it trivialized serious issued and was not nuanced at all. If it wasn't that my mom begged me to watch it more I would not have. I felt just like Laurrie.... It turned out the characters got nuanced, the cult stuff gets explored more legitimately, they HAVE done their homework. Its also very funny much of the time. You would love it. Tell Laurrie what I said too. I can't wait for next season. The pilot isn't a good reflection of what the show becomes later.
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The resemblance to his dad is uncanny. I couldn't tell much about him from that web page, other than that he seems a bit of a rich kid with no real direction to his life, judging from the personal info he supplied.Amazing that he's nearly 30 now, I remember him and Premlata as toddlers up on the stage at those shindigs.
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I must do something wrong when I try to post pics. But yes, it all fits, I think he looks like best of mom and dad...he is a damn good looking boy..thank God he got Marolyn's build. I think it is him too. Everything fits to a T. But some were tricked by another Daya in Malibu...but that time...everything didn't fit.... this time...premie are friending him like sycophants and asking if Daya has a my space. Did you check out his friends list...? It's 1/8 rich kids. 1/8 weird premie sychophants...the rest is young hot women in various provocative poses...he seems to have inherited other things from his father besides olive skin.
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People impersonate celebrities there all the time. I was sifting through Malibu trying to find Hans again and I found about 50 Britney Spears and 50 Jessica Simpsons... but the one I enjoyed finding the most was named Barbie.... I slow at the everything on the computer but writing and toontown. For me to do the work of making a MalaDancingGuru and would take many hours. I suspect a Drek type could do same thing in seconds. Then, invite all the premie sycophants, and Hans, to join. He if he'll accept your invitation? See what the other Daya and all the other premies...who the heck is Fuzbee I would swear I know him.....anyway..friend them all see what happens? I'd do it but I am going to be too busy in Aitutaki watching the boxed DVD of Deadwood.
Modified by Susan at Sun, Jul 23, 2006, 22:38:43
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Susan,If the picture is on a webpage then put the address of the webpage in the Link URL box. If you have the picture on your computer, then put the location of the file in the Attachment box. I haven't tried the Image URL box. John.
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Modified by Susan at Mon, Jul 24, 2006, 11:35:56
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Here is my attempt to follow JHBs directions for pic posting...Hansi or not? I still LOVE that photo of Wadi with the flower crown. She was a really gorgeous child.
Modified by Susan at Mon, Jul 24, 2006, 11:42:00
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Hi Joy and everyoneGood posts on this thread, I agree with you all. I always felt at those dance fests how labored and unnatural it all was, and how contrived. Even the fact that I felt I must be in my mind to feel like that, and tried to psych myself into the bliss that I was sure everyone else must have been feeling. One thing though. I was not in the inner circle in the late 70's at those kind of events. But from the times when I was in the inner circle, and with Maharaji backstage (both before that period and afterwards in the 1980's), I never saw him drink before programs. He was pretty scrupulous about not drinking when it was important to stay sober, like when flying or any program/event. I certainly never saw him drunk, or ever heard of his being drunk, at any event. As you say, he may well have been intoxicated on his own display and belief in his Perfect Mastership, but not I think on alcohol. For all his failings, he has discipline when he choses to exercise it. -- Mike
www.MikeFinch.com
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That's not unusual. I'd bet he sure drank after the event, though. But only those who'd lived with him would know that, and they're all X-rated. Donner or Dettmers may know, if they're still around. It's weird to think about what he might have done after those programs. After you've sat on a throne with a mala and hand-embroidered silk dhoti, pranced around with the Krishna flute with crown on your head while thousands went berserk, smirked through a full length Arti with trays being waved and had people lining up all day to kiss your feet, what do you do with yourself when it's all over? Go home and watch the Simpsons with a bowl of popcorn? It's too bizarre to contemplate.
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He said M did NOT drink before events or flights. Sad that this was more important than driving with his kids in car. Glad nothing bad happened there.
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I noticed that Michael Dettmers said that as well.It's in the "Best of Forum" bit of the archives. I was surprised by the comment because I remembered noticing Maharaji speaking with bleary eyes and slurred speech on a video which I saw more than once ( I think in the eighties).Did anyone else notice anything like this?Maybe it was after Dettmers walked.Those videos were revealingly close up. At the time I was a devoted premie with absolutely no idea that he drank, but I remember thinking to myself " Is he drunk?" and then deciding it must be the intoxicating power of the Holy Name!
Modified by lexy at Sat, Jul 22, 2006, 21:13:05
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I'd bet he sure drank after the event, though. But only those who'd lived with him would know that...Oh yes he definitely drank afterwards. I was there on many occasions, sometimes just myself and him programming on computers and things. And he (and I) certainly drank. You don't have to live with him to know that, you just had to be in what I call the 'inner circle', which I was from time to time. But even then, I don't *think* he drank in reaction to his stage performance. After you've sat on a throne with a mala and hand-embroidered silk dhoti, pranced around with the Krishna flute with crown on your head while thousands went berserk, smirked through a full length Arti with trays being waved and had people lining up all day to kiss your feet, what do you do with yourself when it's all over? Go home and watch the Simpsons with a bowl of popcorn? It's too bizarre to contemplate. Yes, if you think you are Lord of the Universe, and that the whole world should be kissing your feet, then a hall or stadium full of devotees is pretty small beer, and going home to watch the Simpsons with a bowl of popcorn afterwards is *exactly* what you do. Well, of course the Simpsons were not going then, but your tone is exactly right. It is only someone who thought they were pretending, and who suspected that they were not really the Lord worthy of all this devotion and surrender and adoration, who would need to cope with the dissonance - not Maharaji. -- Mike
www.MikeFinch.com
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Thankyou Mike for this insight:
"It is only someone who thought they were pretending, and who suspected
that they were not really the Lord worthy of all this devotion and
surrender and adoration, who would need to cope with the dissonance -
not Maharaji."
This lays to rest any remaining questions I had with reference to his believing in himself or not. It rings true from my limited observations. And I am led to realize that this is the quality we found so attractive or convincing: his total ability to blank out any negative thoughts about guru maharaji. He is the super premie and cannot doubt because he has banned such thoughts from his mind.
This came across to us as total self assurance and confidence, qualities always admired by humans. We were quite willing to believe him, his aura of self confidence was compelling in itself. That, of course does not prove it to be true, but explains how so many optimistic, open minded, wishful thinking westerners fell, as one, for this outrageous fantasy, planted, in his consciousness, at all ages, even from birth and reinforced by the chanting of thousands.
I wonder, if in some ways a sort of tiredness I see, in his eyes, might be entirely due to indulgences or sleep loss, or the gnawing of doubts expressed, or rising, finally from within, but, due, in part, to the fact that he has to be both guru and premie. If he is assailed by doubts about the former, he is still bound by duties acquired as the latter. He, himself must: "Leave no room for doubt in his mind". This sounds inwardly exhausting, or maybe it is not. Perhaps he has successfully insulated himself from all major doubts, in principle, as any long term premie might.
In his case, redirecting his devotion to his guru; to a principle that he has become disciplined to faithfully up hold. He (believes or he) is convinced his entitlements can be proven and are rock solid. His wealthy adornments, (I believe, originally) he thought would help convince us: the western equivalent of krishna dressing up and riding in his chariot. In India it was more fitting to adorn one's deity with wealth.
But in the west wealth has a different connotation, with little relationship to spiritual prowess. He was becoming materialistic and more and more people could see it, except, of course, for premies, to begin with.
The fact is: just because he believes it, no-one else has to. But, for us, once, I think it was a significantly persuasive factor.
Lp
Modified by LP at Sun, Jul 23, 2006, 06:03:19
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That says a lot.Yes, his ultra-self-confidence and self-assurance were what made up his charisma 100%. The absolute certainty with which he spoke those largely meaningless words was what gave them impact. Probably still does for many people. It's feels good to find certainty in an uncertain world, even if it is largely about fluff and nonsense. I think that's how so many of us were drawn in, the absolute certainty of his convictions about who he was, what Knowledge was supposed to be and do, etc. And when our own experiences of it didn't measure up then we got blamed for not having enough faith, surrender, devotion, a faulty practice etc. And I like your comments re the wealth, etc., all very astute.
Joy
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Thanks for your comments Joy, which helped me to clarify my thoughts. I am always asking myself "How did I get so involved?"
I'm sure his indomitable self assurance and resolute sense of purpose were a persuasive part of the picture.
"I think that's how so many of us were drawn in, the absolute certainty
of his convictions about who he was, what Knowledge was supposed to be
and do, etc."
We might have started mildly curious at the outrageous advertising, but when we saw his self confidence, it was a first. It's not everyday that someone just sits there and unashamedly proclaims he's God and just lets us look at him, or talks to us.
Maybe at first I was hedging my bets: giving him the benefit of the doubt, just in case he was telling the truth. But once we crossed an invisible line, our original perspectives and mind sets became, at some point, altered.
For all I can recall, of the actual moment I fell: premiehood might have begun when I asked myself, "What if it's all true?"
Once we were in, as it were, it appears that further subduing of the followers' spirits and self confidence served to make it difficult to turn back. Once self blame had set in, for incompetence on the path: we trudged along feeling somewhat behind the rest of the party, and struggling to catch up. Not to see clearly again, perhaps for decades, perhaps ever.
At the head of the party all was champagne and roses, it appeared or we imagined.
"Only for a straggler like me, does it not work and that's my fault entirely of course, I know that..." we mutter under our breath as we try to keep up, not sure if the churned up trail of prints we are following are even the right ones any more, or whether they ever led anywhere. We might even have been going in circles, following our own footsteps.
Always leave room for doubt in your mind. 
Lp
Modified by LP at Mon, Jul 24, 2006, 08:12:05
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Now I don't intend actually disagreeing with anything you've said on this point cause I have very little evidence about how Rawat feels about this dancing. I know how I felt and how I got over the depression that the 78 Kissimmee dancing and darshan put me in with with copious meditation and satsang. In retrospect, it must have been a really big "drip" cause it didn't take that much more to put me over the edge.
I would like to point out though that enjoying being blissfully, conceitedly happy when 10,000 people gathered at the one spot are deliriously happy with you is not necessarily the mark of a twisted, deluded mind especially when you know that this delirious happiness is going to translate into big donations. Seems perfectly normal to me.
The early videos certainly showed a person who was apprehensive about his upcoming "performance" and very uptight and nervous and constrained in his "dancing" but smiling. If that was betel nut he was chewing while waiting that might have calmed his nerves a bit. The scenes from the Contact video circa 1988 show him serious but calm
before his very brief but free-ish arm waving but the Indians in the
front rows are wild and uninhibited though terrible dancers. The later videos on ex-premie.org from the 40th anniversary do and an Indian religious festival show him happy and smiling during his dancing so I guess he got over his early nerves. And when he sang on New years Eve 1999/2000 he was absolutely blissed out despite his singing being much, much worse than his dancing.
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