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by putting on a pedestal I mean you just love them so much they can't do wrong. well they can of course but you always trust them - it was actually very nice having my mum feel like that about me. And even nicer to feel like that about her. Well I think it's always reciprocal or it wouldn't be what it is. You just wouldn't have those feelings. Not deep down.
Yes feelings - how many times did I say to my ex it feels like you don't really like me. I don't believe I could have formulated how I felt about Guru Maharaji as a premie it was so terrifying to feel so utterly insignificant to the one who was everything, it was only in theory not in feeling that he was everything, but I believed it. I really think we looked for any sign of warmth or favour from him. God forbid he should smile at you in the darshan line, now that would make you feel bullet-proof for a while.
so to clarify, I guess I see feelings as being in different strata. Different entry levels into your consciousness. Rawat could manipulate my upper emotions, he could encourage me to trust, have faith in him even. But those feelings are a pale comparison to what you feel down below.
So yes, you know it's real by the way you feel. 
Modified by lesley at Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 21:18:33
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