I don't know. I've been out now almost as long as I was in the cult 20+ years. I still find myself wondering how my life would have been had I not bought into Rawat's Steaming Pile. Mostly, it's ok but I don't think it ever completely goes away.
Just ran across this:
“One of the saddest lessons of history is this: If we’ve been bamboozled long enough, we tend to reject any evidence of the bamboozle. We’re no longer interested in finding out the truth. The bamboozle has captured us. It’s simply too painful to acknowledge, even to ourselves, that we’ve been taken. Once you give a charlatan power over you, you almost never get it back.”
― Carl Sagan, The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark (at least we know we were bamboozled)