Re: ...that curious converse -- Knowing without Knowing it - My Own Example
Re: Re: Off Topic -- in pursuit of reality and that curious converse -- lesley Top of thread Post Reply Forum
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tarvuist ®

03/26/2017, 12:30:59
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"...the idea of crediting yourself with knowing what you know without knowing it."

Wondering on again this morning about your idea of knowing without knowing, and what it might mean to you and to others, I've remembered an obvious experience of my own of Knowing when I didn't know something:

It's a very vivid memory scored in my brain. 
In a place pretty long ago now, and far from here...

Sitting in a darkened room with a few other people, eyes closed, I saw a huge light rise up from a pinpoint far deep within me, rise up from an indescribable distance within, a brilliance arising from the deepest obscure inside regions of the Within, from far deeper than my entire self-identity, expanding light rising up pervading all space and dissolving any semblance of separate self anywhere, dissolving all extent of limits of my physical and mental being, dissolving the boundaries of my awareness into the infinite, dissolving me into the warm indescribable glow of the unending source of love and beingness.  

Coming away from this, I KNEW I'd been exposed to seeing the ultimate essence of creation, origin of the idea of God, the Reality, the source of all love and life.  I knew it in every sense I might conceive any human Knowing to reach -- Truth in the ultimate eternal form, this brilliance blinding all illusion in this shining all consuming blast of Light from inside Beingness.  (I try to describe this exactly as perceived as it's so vivid in memory and was SO ultimately meaningful to me for most of my life.)

I knew this is Truth, I'd seen what I could call God, I understood all meaning and purpose in existence.
...obviously "The Knowledge" exactly as advertised.  It was suggested to me prior to promise not to describe that experience to anyone. I didn't.

Some 38 years later it occurred to me that was maybe "merely" an effect entirely neurological obviously in the neural matrix of my brain, not an inrush of consciousness, not an opening of my awareness into ultimate Reality and Understanding and Knowing.  

All those years I had been knowing something I didn't know.  So I do in this credit myself with knowing what I knew without knowing it, all that time subsequent.  

It was a very solid and very very comforting knowing until decades later I allowed myself to persistently think about it, which before I'd only accepted it condico sine qua non.  That was an exhilarating way of life, but I do prefer my present more rational sort of knowing and of exploring Reality.  

Wasn't that experience long ago merely a kind of persuasive "in my face" intuition based on my within-ness of knowing, that direct knowing of the Light...just as you use the word "intuition"?

But I'm open to the chance that someday soon, nearer to me in time than are those timeless moments in that little room, I may go back again to dissolve again that light, I suppose.  Ya think?  I'm just not counting on it anymore.

Modified by tarvuist at Sun, Mar 26, 2017, 12:45:37

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