A better thank you!
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Posted by:
Genny ®

08/31/2016, 14:58:22
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Nothing to do with guru, dad, or suicide...just coping with loneliness...a lil piece I wrote...thanks again Bob for your beautiful words...G


Antidote

When in Rome, do as the Romans do
St. Ambrose

Elvis or The Beatles...which one are you?  There's a whole theory of personality based on which of these super star entities you prefer.  Just ask Mia from Pulp Fiction...you may like both...or neither...you probably know most of the songs from both...but you definitely like one more than the other...you're either an Elvis person or a Beatles person...which one are you?

My mother is a Beatle.  If you've ever seen footage of their infamous 1964 Red Rocks concert in Colorado...by the way, best place EVER to see a concert...you've seen my mom.  She was one of those crazy, crying, screaming, passing out, throwing shoes girls, who thought they just might die and go to heaven that night.  Her BFF at the time (my aunt Karen) was a few years older, her current BFF (my aunt Mike) is too, and they are both Elvis people.  So last night when the Elvis impersonator contest finals came to our small town (that has three huge casinos), my mother had no desire to go...Mike could barely contain her school girl excitement and invited me to go with her.  Really, I'm not either...Elvis or Beatles...they're both the same to me, great icons of the recent past.  I used to watch Elvis movie marathons in my childhood summers and I know most of his songs, he's super handsome and looks a lot like my dad, and you can't deny the massive influence he had on an entire generation.  I remember the day he died and how devastated people were...I'm no fanatic, but I like him just fine.  But, if I HAVE to pick one based on Mia's mandate, I'd have to stick with Mom and choose The Beatles.  When I heard the Millennial on TMZ say that The Beatles are irrelevant I about shit!  (No, context didn't help).  I can't believe they didn't fire her right on the spot.  I hope someone at the very least gave her a proper education on the matter and showed her the reality of their influence.  She probably had no clue that a good portion of her own play list has more than a few Beatle references and covers.  If by "irrelevant" she meant "most covered band ever", then yeah, The Beatles are irrelevant.  

Anyway, the Elvis impersonator contest was definitely a "when in Rome" situation.  It's one thing to cover your favorite music, another thing entirely to cover their whole being.  I've always kinda rolled my eyes at the impersonators...a silly Vegas novelty at best, totally ridiculous and sort of annoying at worst.  If I'd have been home in Denver and the invite came, I'd probably have declined.  Having roughly a million other choices of good music to go see, well...I'd have passed on ridiculous Elvis...thanks anyway.  But here I am, completely isolated from friends and Denver or anything familiar...I'm practically in Vegas with nothing better to do and an open mind and an utterly broken heart.  The Pulse shootings in Orlando just happened last week, I haven't heard from anyone I love save for two souls in the almost three months since I was displaced and my loneliness really hurts...the only antidote is a night of crazy, silly, wildly fantastical and freedom to be as ridiculous as possible entertainment.  It was one of the best things I ever did.

I let the empath in me take over, and she soaked up all the joy in the room full of 70 year old 15 years olds.  All the joy of the 12 Elvis finalists who truly love him, what they do, and their fans.  All the joy of the adorable MC who was a showgirl and sang a song she wrote as we waited for the winner announcement ~ PMS Blues ~ it was fucking hilarious and Mike and I were cracking up, sure she wrote the song for ME!  The youngest contestant was 20 years old...he did '50's Elvis in the black and white suit.  The oldest was the one who spotted me in the casino restaurant where we had dinner and came over to chat with us and make sure we were going to the show.  He was '70's Elvis, in his white fringed and beaded leather suit, all the jewelry and glamour you'd expect from the real Elvis...and if you were one of those people, you'd suspect that he was...hmmmmm.  We found out later as they announced the winner, that he was from our little town of Mesquite, and that he was 81 years old, born the same year and for a moment I thought, 'maybe...just maybe...'  He was adorable, it was a great time and I'm sorry that I ever judged them...silly silly men...bring so much joy.

The other antidote for my desert blues was found in a movie theatre.  Our tiny town has two large movie places and I always thought it was a bit much.  The two times I'd been before when we vacationed here before moving, we were the only ones there...a huge theatre all to ourselves.  We saw no reason to go to our movie any more than a few minutes early...I had no idea how many young families there are here in our new desert home.  I found out when "Finding Dory"  came to town.  If you find yourself with a case of the blues, go see a kid movie with all the town's kiddos.  No way will your heart not melt. Now, the theatre had probably never experienced anything like it and they were totally unprepared for the massive crowd that descended their normally peaceful movieplex...they did their best I'm sure, but it was a fiasco.  It was a sold out show, and they had to assign seating which of course no one stuck to...families were split apart, no one was where they were supposed to be, and they actually had to pause the movie for about 5 minutes while they figured it all out.  I ended up taking on the role of surrogate mom for two sweet little sisters, probably about 7 and 10 years old...their other siblings were younger and stayed with actual mom, and the girls were happy to sit with me.

The older one was next to me and the younger one was next to her.  They were both so brave to be away from their mom, and they trusted me completely with their excitement at the 3D visuals, their comments and questions about the movie, and the bloody nose.  
The younger one had a little nose bleed during the previews.  Big sister helped her at first, but she became consumed with the pre show mini movie about a baby bird, and forgot about her little sister.  I glanced over and she was just sitting there holding a huge wad of movie napkins under her little nose, waiting for someone to tell her what to do.  I was overly concerned and preparing for the worst, ready to find mom in the sea of people...only because I was plagued with horrifying bloody noses until I got to my 30's.  I asked how she was, she said, "I don't know", and I just melted.  I told her to check the napkins and asked, "a little or a lot"?  I didn't see any blood, she said it was just a little and we decided together that she was fine and ready to enjoy the show.  The movie short ended, "Finding Dory" started and all was well.  Until the big sister leaned over and asked, "How do animals have their babies"?

It took every ounce of energy I had to contain the raucous laughter happening inside of me and I'm just thinking, 'oh shit, oh shit...what do I say to this child'?  I wasn't at all prepared for this kind of surrogacy and I was grateful for the 3D glasses that hid the strange combination of terror and laughter in my eyes.  I didn't want her to pick up on the fact that the question was loaded or one generally reserved for mom...or someone she actually knows...it was so sweet and innocent.  Thinking of the short and the feature, I leaned over and whispered, "birds and fish both lay eggs", and she nonchalantly said, "cool" and we settled into the movie.  Not sure how long it took for my belly to stop shaking...god she was cute!  At one point she asked me if I knew that Dori was Ellen Degeneres, we agreed on how cool she was, and then she said that I looked like I had been on her show...like a movie star.  I melted again and I can't believe I didn't squeeze her to death.  It was the summer dress and hair scarf and glasses I had on...if that doesn't chip away at the blues I don't know what would.  

We all cheered at the end of the sweet tale and I left the theatre with a huge smile on my heart.  It was 10:30pm and we walked outside to a cool 100*...compared to the 119* we peaked at a few hours earlier it wasn't so bad.  Oh God...I could've gone my whole life happy not knowing what anything above 101* felt like...ugh...just keep swimming...just keep swimming.








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